the august letter

 Dear Darsh,

You are finally over PK, but at what cost! Every night before sleeping you make us play bajrangi bhaijaan the movie, without any forwards. You dance at all the songs and rush to the bathroom so that you don’t miss even a single scene. This has been going on for a few weeks. Yesterday we had gone to the market and you made us buy the now-famous BB hanuman gadda locket. You dance to selfie le le re wearing it. We had put an animation movie for you today but you slept during it! Did I mention you never sleep when BB is playing… I am not anti-bollywood at all but you have become an extreme Bollywood fan and it’s hilarious and exasperating at the same time.

You refuse to go to the park as you are afraid of the bugs and lizards there. You have hardly gone to the dance class this month. Infact you have devised a new form of dance for all your favorite songs sung by atif aslam and arijit. I feel it’s a slow kathak and western mixed but the jury is still out on that one.

You are learning physical violence in school. Today you punched me in the nose and when asked, you revealed that one of your friends had hurt you in school. But you still refuse to hit back your friends and depend on your teacher to intervene on your behalf. Let’s see how long that goes.

You made us buy a microphone last night and made us listen to your Bollywood renditions, speech on Japan and instructions on discipline among other things. And then we had an interesting session with you on mic and me on drums. You have realized you can’t wait for your birthday to have a party so you invited all your friends for a party and then told me about it very solemnly one evening.

The bitter-sweet relationship with your father continues. Things had peaked last month after the famous fallout when you pinched and pulled him repeatedly for a week even though he kept telling you it hurts. Finally he threatened to lock you in the bathroom which led you to believe he is you enemy no 1. The incident, you narrated, told and retold to all our relatives, random people in the lift, all your school friends, teachers, your vice principal and even a toddler and his parents in the mall. Ofcourse it has reached epic proportions now since you are a Bollywood fan and in the last version I heard, you were showing mosquito bites as places where he had hurt you! I did try to tell your teachers that your fabrications (please read LIES) have become quite fantastic but they praised you for your story telling skills and creative bent.

It was my birthday this week and after the dinner-out you were still wondering where the party was. Needless to say you were hugely disappointed to finally figure out what a grown-up’s party really means.

On rakshbhandan day you were very excited to get all the ten rakhis tied and you kept proclaiming loudly that you love all your sisters very much. However, you refused to get even the second rakhi tied, took off the first one within one hour and were ready to leave the minute you got the rakhi gift from your cousins. You grabbed the bags and told your daddi, “chalo daadi ho gaya”. Yes we were a little embarrassed.

But all in all you are cute kid making us proud with you perfectly formed sentences and new learnings every day. We love you and your funny antics!